Hi, welcome to....my life?

So, I haven't typed in awhile. I've been too "busy", believe it or not. I may only work 20 hours a week, but it's enough to make me feel like I am working 50+. I like my job, I really do. I could do without some of the people who come in, but all in all, I really like it. I am first in line to become the next assistant manager when our current assistant takes over as store manager when our current store manager leaves to pursue a "career" somewhere else, soon. My assistant manager makes me feel like I can do anything. She is very sweet and caring, she believes in me and if I don't understand something the first time, she reassures me that I will learn it over time and it's not just me.

I'm scared about the promotion, I have a hard time working the 20 hours a week, I can't imagine what it's gonna be like working 40+, having to be called at whim when something happens (or doesn't happen), covering people's shifts when they don't/can't come in (which I've been doing anyhow), etc. I'm sure I will do fine, just saying.

We finally have new phones again. I love my blackberry curve more than any phone I have ever owned. It does everything but provide food when I ask it to. I'm still learning how to use it, but hopefully it will all come with time.

School starts in just over 2 weeks. I'm soooooo happy. Not because the kids won't be home, but because I won't have to fight with Nick's ex about when the girls can and can't be here during the week, because God forbid, I have a job and don't have a man who is unemployed and sitting on his butt to be a live in babysitter. Oh wait, that's Elijah father I am talking about. My bad. I refuse to pay daycare for 5 kids when the only reason we have the girls like we do, is because I wasn't employed at the time that the agreement was made in May. So!

Well, now it's time for me to get ready for work again, so I didn't get a chance to finish. Maybe some other day!

News

I posted a blog a couple days ago. In it, I believe I had talked about having an interview at Payless on Wednesday. Well, I went to the interview and was being interviewed solely by the Assistant Manager, Penny. The store manager, Cambria, was there, but Penny is training to take over Cam's position, so she left it to Penny to do the interviewing. I had a REALLY good interview, Penny was very personable and because of that, I wasn't nervous or having my panic attacks like I normally would. We got through the interview and the "mock store experience" and she sent me home. I had a few errands to run after the interview and got home around 5. I barely sat down at the computer and the phone rang. It was Cam saying that she wanted me to come in on Thursday for a very short interview with her, so she could get a feel for me. I agreed and hung up. At 6:30 Wednesday night, I was chillin' when Cam called once again. She said she had been talking to Penny and had decided to go with her decision and offer me the position. I had my first shift last night. I was supposed to work from 4:15-7:15, but since I'm getting a "crash course" in training, they wanted me to stay and close with them. I agreed to stay and proceeded my night with 2 managers telling me different things every second of the night.

I ended up going 4 straight hours, on my feet, in non-supportive shoes (lol) with no break. I was sent home at 8:15 because Penny was afraid I was being overwhelmed despite my best efforts to play it off. I admit, I WAS overwhelmed, but I also knew there would always be someone there for me to ask questions if I need it in the next coming weeks. Cambria informed me that she was going to make me key/code carrier by Sunday (which I thought was pretty cool). She had decided not to make one of the other employee key/code carrier so that she could make me one. Yay me!

Let me tell ya, Payless isn't just about selling shoes. With Wal Mart and Toys R Us, I never had to deal with any numbers, I just did my job and went on with my life. Payless is ALLLLLLLLLLLLL about numbers and customers. We have goals to meet every day. We have numbers for the register, numbers for the safe (that we all have access to), numbers to the alarm, numbers for shoes, numbers for EVERYthing. Good thing I am good at remembering numbers! We have this "Customer Journey" we have to go through with every customer that walks in the store. We have to greet them and offer them help, offer to measure feet if a child comes in the store, we suggest trying having them try on as many pairs as possible (ew) and have to compliment, then we have to upsell accessories and/or jewelry with each sale. Each cashier has their own numbers for their goals, plus our numbers for our team goals. It's just insane. I think it will come as a second wind once I have been around longer than, say, a day, but at first it really is kind of confusing.

So, I got hired to work 8-12 hrs. a week. I was told last night for the next couple weeks would be more around 20 hrs. I'm cool with that. We could totally use the money right now. I go back at 6:15 tonight and am definitely closing...so happy we close at 9 and are out by 9:15. It's early enough for me to come home and see my hubby for about 45 minutes before we pass out on our faces.

I have tomorrow night off, per my request, because we have tickets to go see BILL ENGVALL!!!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHH!!! I'm so excited!!!

And tomorrow is my oldest baby's birthday! He's gonna be 9!!

So, anyway, that's that!

The conclusion to "the gasp" from the previous post

So, I dropped the kids off with Tim and whatsherface yesterday. She was already out of the car when we pulled in and I was going to let them approach me cause I really wasn't interested in what they had to say. Or so I thought.

Tim gets out of the car as the boys are getting into their car and he has papers in his hand. Now, in my head I think, "Oh my God. What is he serving me with NOW?" He hands them to me and asks if I had gotten a copy. I quickly glance over the packet and notice that it is from the school district and it is regarding Brandon's TAG results. Wait...*blink blink blink*I never consented to him being tested for TAG. I had told Tim, Brandon's teacher and Brandon's psychologist that I had considered him being placed, but I wanted him to mature a little more before being put through another change. So, while Tim (I assume, since the letter was addressed to him) allowed them to test Brandon for TAG, I was unaware. But, I guess I don't mind. I knew he would make it. He qualified based on his Math and Reading. Good job, kiddo. So, his teacher will come up with a PEP (Personal Education Plan) for him next year and this last through the end of 5th grade, where he will be evaluated again to see if he needs to be in it for 6th grade.

While talking to my mom, I found that I was put in GATE (California's version of TAG) for my Reading and Vocabulary? Yay me. I don't know what happened to said Vocabulary, but, meh.

So, we talked, civilly for about 10 minutes or so. In the almost 2 years that Nick and I have been together, we have never talked face to face except the one time that I cornered Tim when his wife wasn't there and screamed at him for something. We talked about sports. Devin is going to do football and Brandon will be in soccer. We hope that they both do well enough to earn the privelage to play baseball in the Spring. They mentioned they would need our help with the sports in the sense that games and/or practices may overlap and one set of parents would need to be in one place while the other set was in the other. We could possibly swap at half time. I'm excited for the kids, they need the extra-cirricular activities.

Nick mentioned to me this afternoon that he had been interviewed by the VP? of his company for a Sales Manager position he applied for. He has applied for a couple of Sales positions (mainly for the pay increase, I think) and was overlooked. He got his chance to talk this time and I am so proud. While the VP said that they prefer someone with more Sales experience, they wouldn't mind giving him a shot as a Sales Coordinator should a position come up. So, Nick (again, so proud) spoke up and asked if there was anything he could do to better his understanding of the position and he suggested getting him set up with a training class. YAY! While I don't really think he should be going for the position for the reason he is, I also know he is not happy in the position he is currently in. Not that he doesn't like the work, but he doesn't like the lack of work his co-worker does in the same area. I don't like the idea of him having to travel like he will have to. He hates just being away from me for the 8 hours while at work (and I do, too), but if that's what makes him happy, so be it. So, we will keep our fingers crossed and cross the bridge when we get there.

Time marches on

Well, here we are, damn it...the in-laws will be home tomorrow. It was SOOO nice to have such a long break, but we sure miss the girls around here. Has to be really hard on their mom. She gets them back for 2 nights and then they come to our house for 8 days. Hey, her choice, but I still feel for her.

The oldest boys leave for their dad's today at 3 until Sunday, just like normal. I got a phone call out of the blue from "him" yesterday asking if I ever got his text. When I informed him I never got such a thing, he told me he must have sent it to my old number (for whatever reason, he hasn't seemed to delete it yet). So, I asked him what it was about and he said that he wanted to know what school the kids were going to next year because he was inquiring about sports (insert gasp here) for them and they needed to know. I told them that despite my animosity for him, they would be returning to Fruitdale. Not to convenience him any, but because it is a VERY good school and they treated us VERY well this last year. They understand the situation between Tim and I and all the visitation and they are still allowing the kids to come back, even though we don't live in the boundaries. I feel very thankful for this.

Both of the kids told me they have been waiting to play baseball (I thought baseball "season" was over), but Tim is giving them the option of Soccer or Football. Devin has played a year of both (albeit soccer wasn't the league, it was with the Y when he was 5) and Brandon has yet to play because I am scared for his behavior issues. Tim has agreed with me that we need to let him try. Devin has chosen Football once again and Brandon has chosen Soccer (if baseball is not available in the Fall). I am very proud of them but nervous about the practice schedule coinciding with any chances of me getting/having a job.

The kids have done fairly well since school has let out. They are 100% willing to help me out when asked. I just wish they were old enough to do the dishes so I didn't have to hurt every time I did. Although they do the laundry (I just have to measure out the amount of clothes and do the soap and softener) and take out the garbage for me, I just don't trust them with that yet. lol

Devin and Allison's birthdays are next month. Alli's on the 3rd and Devin's on the 25th. We are going to combine the parties like we did with Brandon and Emma this year, can't really afford to do 2 different ones. We have decided to have it at Morrison park so that the kids (and adults if they wanna) can get wet, eat and play, all at the same time! It's a pretty park, I just wish it had more shade or gazebos. Then we don't have another birthday until mine in October, which doesn't ever amount to much and then Eli's Thomas themed party in December!

Alright, I have rambled enough. On with your day!

It's a hard knock life

So, my son has, apparently, reached a point in his toddler-hood that he has decided to do things outta the norm. He is usually pretty good at associating pens, pencils, crayons and the like with paper ONLY. So, the other day the boys are switching the laundry for me and I hear, "MOOOM!!! COME HERE!!!!"

This is what I found:

AND

I especially like the detail he went into on the dryer, quite creative.

Magic Eraser, here I come!

So, then after a few days of "behaving", I get pictures like these:

So, today I am sitting here, minding my own business planting my farm on Facebook and I hear another "UM...MOM?! Elijah is painting his hands and head!"

I jump up. "WHAT?!?!"

I ran into my bedroom to find pink nailpolish open and indeed all over his hands, head and my khaki down comforter.

I was so upset that I called Nick at work. No answer. So, I called my friend and told her she needed to think of something for me to do cause I was so pissed off I couldn't think straight. She told me the most obvious was to get the nail polish remover. So, I rinsed his hands off in the sink and grabbed my comforter, dragging it into the livingroom and sat and cried while scrubbing the nail polish off my beloved blanket. No luck. It took the thickness of the polish out, but not the color. I then polish removed Elijah's hands. And thought, what am I going to do about his head/hair? I quickly doused his head with remover and rubbed away with no such luck. I threw him in the shower, shampooed his head (twice) and got him out. By this time the polish was dry, so I took a brush and yanked through his hair best I could. It started out like this:

(that would be the corner of my blanket on the left side of the shot)

After the shower and the brushing, it looked more like this:

Sometimes I think God is looking down at me and laughing. lol

Man. I tell ya. This kid is gonna be the death of me.

I'm really just floored right now

I just don't understand the jealousy between me and the video games. Other than the fact that I feel left out. I like to play that game, too, but while he asked me twice if I wanted to play, there was no way it could happen. He has enough friends on Xbox Live to create a small Army, so there was no room in the group. Not to mention that he was playing with the friends that I have had conflicts with in the past (ie: name calling because I'm a girl and I whooped 'em, plain and simple)...but, instead of him saying, "Hey, Des wants to play, too.", he lets it go. Doesn't say anything to anyone.

I decide to let it go and start my crocheting. That didn't take off well cause I got confused and I'm not sure if I'm doing it right, and my glorious MIL who taught me how to do this, is gone. So, I tried getting on the computer. But I get bored on the computer. So, I got dressed and went for my daily walk, alone. It was nice to not have to push the 40lb. sack-0f-potatoes up and down all those hills, but he didn't even realize I left. Sad thing? I walked in between him and the tv multiple times, fully dressed in my walking outfit. Then, I walked right out the front door that he was sitting next to. I decided to text him after I hit the road and let him know to keep an ear out for the kids who were occupying themselves at the time. I didn't get a response until I was about at the end of the line and ready to turn home and it only consisted of, "Where did you go?" I replied with, "Out." because I was in quite a stride and didn't want to lose it to stop and text and I can't text and walk too well.

I walked as fast and as hard as I could to get all the animosity out, only to find I never got an acknowledgment that I was home. I let it go. I got in the shower, got out, finished dessert and served it to the kids, sat down at the computer (again, next to him) and started surfing the web. I was reading Susan's blog when I saw him get up and look in the little basket that holds all of our Xbox junk and noticed he was probably looking for the plug and play charger that I had loaned the kids who are playing the other Xbox in our room. I went in (without him speaking to me in anyway), grabbed it from the kids who were done using it, and brought it out and tossed it on the couch. He picked it up and plugged it and and guess what?! NOTHIN! I didn't get a thanks, an F-You, nothin.

This is getting very bothersome that his WHOLE freaking life just STOPS when it comes to the games. It's ridiculous. Really.

(and on a side note, now that he saw me typing this up, he will probably find it and "the shitteth will hitteth the fanneth"! Oh well, at least I will get him to acknowledge I'm alive)

General ramblings from a derranged mind

Things have been happening. Some good, mostly bad. Story of my life, right? But, I'm not here to focus on ALL the bad things, just want to post because I haven't in awhile.

Where to start...

I seemed to have pulled out of most of my depression once the sun came out and I was out of the house more and things calmed down enough that I wasn't constantly crying. It's not ALL gone, I don't know that it ever will be, but I feel a lot better than I used to on a day to day basis.

My in-laws left to Oklahoma for 2 weeks last Monday. I could only hope that they would decide to come back, pack up and leave. Knowing my luck, that won't be the case. I appreciate all they have done for us and then some, but I really just want away from here. With the 3 of us being unemployed and having a 2 1/2 year old in the house full time and 4 others part time, I really just can't deal. They will be back next Monday night, I'd assume, with the girls in tow.

I had an "interview" on Friday. I only put it in quotes because she really just wanted to meet me and then told me to tell her about myself. It only took about 10 minutes and I'm supposed to hear back anytime now on if I got the job as a glorious "Sandwich Artist" at Subway. LOL Hey, it's a job.

I did the dishes today. It killed me in the process, but I still, eventually, got them done. I started thinking about it as I was scrubbing the pots and pans from last night's baked chicken and pasta and wondered why it is when Nick does the dishes, he leaves the pots and pans (about 96% of the time) and when I have asked him why in the past, he tells me to just be happy he helped (more or less). I AM happy he helps, as pretty soon I don't think I will be able to do it, so either he or the kids will have to take over, but I just wonder why. Men. LOL

So, my kids are absolutely amazing. Both Devin and Brandon have been recognized for being the top readers in their classes with the most AR (Academic Reading) Points each. They read books and then take tests on the computer, they get points based on the level book that they read and on how many questions they got right. They have been helping me around the house, too. They put the wet stuff in the dryer and start it and bring me the dry stuff. They have been taking the garbage out and other various things. Of course, I DID have to bring the word "Allowance" into it, but hey, it gets them going!

Elijah is a prodigy all on his own. For being 2 1/2, he is something. He can count to 14 in english and spanish (rarely missing a number), he can visually recognize his numbers to 10, he is singing Twinkle, Twinkle, Itsy Bitsy Spider and is working on Old MacDonald and his ABC's. He is starting to recognize his letters, but I think he gets overwhelmed. Just about everything is the letter "E" to him right now, but he's working on it. He is making complete sentences such as, "I don't like that." "I don't want that." "I don't see it." "That's beautiful, Mommy." "Where is my other sandal shoe?" lol I caught him playing on the house phone the other day, the conversation went something like this:

"Hello? Hi. *insert jarble* strawberries! *insert more jarble* Okay? Bye." and he sets the phone down. lol

Kids, gotta love them.